Mata Jito ji

Mata Jito ji was wife of Guru Gobind Singh ji. she was the daughter of Bhai Hari Jas,
a Subhikkhi Khatri of Lahore. The betrothal had taken place in 1673. The father-inlaw
had desired that the bridegroom should come at the head of a marriage party to
Lahore where the ceremony should be performed with due dignity.
The fateful events leading to the martyrdom of Guru Tegh Bahadur intervened, and in
the changed circumstances it was not possible for the young Guru to go to Lahore.
Therefore a temporary encampment was raised near the village of Basantgarh, 10 km
north of Anandpur, and named Guru ka Lahore where the nuptials were held on 23
Har 1734 Bk/21 June 1677.
On 30th March 1699, Guru Gobind Singh created Khalsa at Anandpur. He declared
that this Khalsa will be both Saints as well as Soldiers. When Gobind Singh was
preparing amrit (nectar) for initiating the Khalsa, on this occasion , stirring clean
water in an iron bowl with a khanda or double-edged sword, Mata Jitoji, as the
tradition goes, came with sugar crystals which were dropped into the vessel at the
Guru's bidding. Sweetness was thus added to the alchemy of steel. Mata Jito ji was the
first Khalsa Woman.
Three sons were born to Mata Jitoji - Jujhar Singh (14March 1691), Zorawar Singh
(17 November 1696) and Fateh Singh (25 February 1699). Mata Jito Ji raised her
three sons on the martyrdom tales of their grandfather Guru Tegh Bahadur and great
great grandfather Guru Arjan Dev ji. She told them a Sikh never runs from a battle
field. It was because of her teachings that all her three sons attained Martyrdom Jujhar
Singh when was only 15 years old fighting with Mughals at Chamkaur, Zorawar
Singh and Fateh Singh who were only 9 and 6 years old at the hands of Wazir Khan,
Mughal Governor of Sarhind, when the young Sahibzades would not convert to Islam.
Mata Jitoji left this world at Anandpur on 5 December 1700, years before the
martyrdom of her sons or the events leading to the battle of Chamkaur. The cremation
took place at Agampura, near the Holgarh Fort. A memorial shrine now stands upon
the spot.
Article taken from these book.
Encyclopedia of Sikhism edited by Harbans Singh ji.
Why did Guru Gobind Singh have more than one wife?
How many marriages did Guru Gobind Singh have?
The wrong impression that the Guru had more than one wife was created by those
writers who were ignorant of Punjabi culture. Later authors accepted those writings
indicating more than one marriage of the Guru and presented it as a royal act. During
those days kings, chiefs, and other important people usually had more than one wife
as a symbol of their being great and superior to the common man. Guru Gobind
Singh, being a true king, was justified in their eyes to have had more than one wife.
This is actually incorrect.
In Punjab, there are two and sometimes three big functions connected with marriage,
i.e., engagement, wedding, and Muklawa. Big gatherings and singings are held at all
these three functions. In many cases, the engagement was held as soon as the person
had passed the infant stage. Even today engagements at 8 to 12 years of age are not
uncommon in some interior parts of India. The wedding is performed a couple of
years after the engagement. After the wedding, it takes another couple of years for the
bride to move in with her in laws and live there. This is called Muklawa. A dowry and
other gifts to the bride are usually given at this time of this ceremony to help her to
establish a new home. Now, the wedding and Muklawa are performed on the same
day and only when the partners are adults.
A big befitting function and other joyful activities were held at Anand Pur, according
to custom, at the time of the engagement of the Guru. The bride, Mata Jeeto Ji,
resided at Lahore, which was the capital of the Mughal rulers who were not on good
terms with the Gurus. When the time for the marriage ceremony came, it was not
considered desirable for the Guru to go to Lahore, along with the armed Sikhs in large
numbers. Furthermore, it would involve a lot of traveling and huge expenses, in
addition to the inconvenience to the Sangat, younger and old, who wished to witness
the marriage of the Guru. Therefore, as mentioned in the Sikh chronicles, Lahore was
'brought' to Anand Pur Sahib for the marriage instead of the Guru going to Lahore. A
scenic place a couple of miles to the north of Anand Pur was developed into a nice
camp for the marriage. This place was named Guru Ka Lahore. Today, people are
going to Anand Pur visit this place as well. The bride was brought to this place by her
parents and the marriage was celebrated with a very huge gathering attending the
ceremony.
The two elaborate functions, one at the time of engagement and the other at the time
of the marriage of the Guru, gave the outside observers the impression of two
marriages. They had reason to assume this because a second name was also there, i.e.,
Mata Sundari Ji. After the marriage, there is a custom in the Panjab of giving a new
affectionate name to the bride by her inlaws. Mata Jeeto Ji, because of her fine
features and good looks, was named Sundari (beautiful) by the Guru's mother. The
two names and two functions gave a basis for outsiders to believe that the Guru had
two wives. In fact, the Guru had one wife with two names as explained above.
Some historians even say that Guru Gobind Singh had a third wife, Mata Sahib Kaur.
In 1699, the Guru asked her to put patasas (puffed sugar) in the water for preparing
Amrit when he founded the Khalsa Panth. Whereas Guru Gobind Singh is recognized
as the spiritual father of the Khalsa, Mata Sahib Kaur is recognized as the spiritual
mother of the Khalsa.
People not conversant with the Amrit ceremony mistakenly assume that Mata Sahib
Kaur was the wife of Guru Gobind Singh. As Guru Gobind Singh is the spiritual but
not the biological father of the Khalsa, Mata Sahib Devan is the spiritual mother of
the Khalsa, Mata Sahib Devan is the spiritual mother of the Khalsa but not the wife of
Guru Gobind Singh.
From ignorance of Punjabi culture and the Amrit ceremony, some writers mistook
these three names of the women in the life of Guru Gobind Singh as the names of his
three wives. Another reason for this misunderstanding is that the parents of Mata
Sahib Devan, as some Sikh chronicles have mentioned, had decided to marry her to
Guru Gobind Singh. When the proposal was brought for discussion to Anandpur, the
Guru had already been married. Therefore, the Guru said that he could not have
another wife since he was already married. The dilemma before the parents of the girl
was that, the proposal having become public, no Sikh would be willing to marry her.
The Guru agreed for her to stay at Anand Pur but without accepting her as his wife.
The question arose, as most women desire to have children, how could she have one
without being married. The Guru told, "She will be the "mother" of a great son who
will live forever and be known all over the world." The people understood the hidden
meaning of his statement only after the Guru associated Mata Sahib Devan with
preparing Amrit by bringing patasas. It is, therefore, out of ignorance that some
writers consider Mata Sahib Devan as the worldly wife of Guru Gobind Singh.